Dr. Tom Here, Got A Minute?
You know, back in my basic training when I was getting into counseling and psychotherapy, we did couples therapy. And we used to get couples in and they’d be pointing fingers at each other and arguing back and forth, “You did this”, and “You did that”, and “You should have done this”, and “You should have done that”.
Essentially we used to say that they were shitting all over each other.
But I always found that they were using time and energy inefficiently. They were so busy blaming and trying to figure out who was to blame for the problem that they never fixed the problem.
So if you’ve got limited time and limited energy, my suggestion is that you fix the problem, not the blame.
It’s going to take your time, and it’s going to take your energy—and I think it’s a little wiser expenditure.
So, until next time.